Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Uncomfortable Ramblings...

So, I am in bed. I should be going to sleep (Yeah, it's early but I got up early today and I have to again tomorrow and it was a long day today) but I'm bugged.

See, there was this thread on Facebook that got this really really long conversation going that was about the sin of gaiety. Now, obviously the people IN the thread didn't talk about it like that. It'd appear to be making light of what is obviously a life or after-life discussion. (See what I did there? Yeah, I'm freaking hysterical aren't I?)

There seemed to be two, maybe three points in the argument. I should start with the given's like in Geometry when you start with a given you them move through your proof to your conclusion. The given accepted by all was that being a big ole homo is a sin. No questions asked. The points of debate were how much of a sin was it I think.

Some seemed to think it was unforgivable since the sinners (that'd be the queers, can we call us queers if we're mocking an argument?) were embracing their lifestyle. Unlike those who lie, cheat on their spouses, neglect their kids, covet their neighbor's minivan & buy new cars instead of driving a functional beater and giving their excess wealth to feed the hungry and clothe the poor straights out there. All those people, those sins are forgivable. But those pesky gays... they gotta just burn.

Another argument was, "Hey. Yeah, it's a sin. I get that... but so is lying, gossiping, back-stabbing, being unfaithful... why you picking on the gay sinners? Why not point out everybody's flaws while you're at it?" I kind of liked that one the most honestly since it feels the most honest... and seemed most in line with what Jesus had to say on the topic of us talking about other people's sins. Not Moses or Paul, but Jesus Himself.
Matthew 7: 1-5
1 Judge not, that ye be not judged.
2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam [is] in thine own eye?
5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.

The last argument seemed along the lines of "Yes. It's sin and I don't want to look at it so don't make me. I'm not saying I'm any better than them. I'm saying I don't want to have to look at it." Which is... here's the thing. Assuming they think it's a sin, and they obviously do, Of COURSE they don't want to look at it. They probably also don't rent Nightmare on Elm Street 1-21 or Saw or Debbie Does Dallas either. My guess is they're trying to surround themselves with things that support and encourage the things they believe in. I can't fault them for that honestly. I am gay and I try and surround myself with things that support and encourage the things I believe in.

What do I believe in as a big ole nasty evil gay? I believe I should help those less fortunate than myself. I believe if I spend more time helping other people than I do looking down on them for their faults that I'm getting closer to right. I believe that people want to be good. I believe it's easier to sin than to not sin. I believe in supporting people's good decisions and letting them know when they make a bad decision that you disagree with their decision but you still love them. I believe I live my life in a way that if Jesus himself were standing over my shoulder he'd mostly be OK with it. OK. He'd probably pretty much hate my job but I'm talking about my outside of work life. I'm talking about how I treat my friends, the people I love, my family, the man I love.

Here's the thing. I probably had some people nodding right up until those last 4 words... but I bet I can get 'em back. I've loved the same man since erm... April 1988 and we had a pretty good life together for a long time. (He moved, he's not dead.) In all that time the part of the ghey that sets people to frothing and quivering with barely constrained outrage... the sex... we didn't do that bit. So, my sin is, in loving another man, not in laying with him like a woman because honestly, that NEVER happened. (We slept in the same bed in January of 89 after the Superbowl but it was perfectly innocent. There wasn't another bed and we kept our clothes on. It was very 1960s of us.)

Here's the part that has me bugged. Some of those people in the thread... would they want me at their house? Would they want me at a family gathering/event or would they be upset that I was there? I don't know and I like them. I really think they're good people. But now I'm wondering do they think I'm NOT good people and they're too polite to say?

(I've turned off comments on this one because God knows what google search results will drag into THIS particular post lol) If you want to comment I'm cross posting this to google + and I wish you'd comment there. Here's a link to there.)