Saturday, September 09, 2017

Fallout 4: Billy, the kid in the fridge

As you know may or may not know, I’ve been playing a lot of Fallout 4... a lot... more than I’ll admit to so don’t even ask. If forced I’ll lie. Don’t make me lie.

I was on the way back to I dunno, wandering around or something and I heard coming from behind a house, the sound of someone yelling to let them out. What the heck? A mission! I was super excited because it’d probably be a quick one.

So, I toddled off to look behind the house and what do I see? A fridge!! Oh please... please let the person in the fridge be named Indy. Turns out the kid in the fridge (That’s the name of the quest too) climbed in the fridge to escape the nuclear bombs 200 years ago. Sadly, the radiation turned him into a ghoul. Ghoul’s are radiation ruined people... I say ruined, but they can live forever and don’t get tired or need sleep really... sometimes they sleep though... I dunno. The lore is a little odd on the needs of ghouls. But here he is, literally the very first ghoul-kid I can remember seeing. Now, there may have been more. But I don’t remember them. I remember normal kids, unmutated ones, but no muties, ghouls as they’re called in game. Well, I opened it and he wasn’t called Indy. His name was Billy.He’s pretty burnt up, turns out radiation DOES make it through a fridge. Sorry, Indiana Jones. You should be a ghoul now... and kinda he’s turning into one. Some people age better than others.

Anyway. While talking to Billy the ghoul I find he’s been locked in there for 200 years and he wants me to take him home to see his parents because, as he looks around at the devastated landscape, a result of nuclear war and two hundred years of zero-highway maintenance, he realizes things don’t look familiar to him anymore, and he doesn’t think he can find the way back.

I said I would but not before THIS guy shows up and makes a strange request. Now, I’ve HEARD of slavers and raiders and I’ve killed my share of raiders and gang members throughout the game but this guy, his name is Bullet by the way, pops up while I’m walking the ghoul home, fully expecting to find a blown up house and get to watch Billy fall to his knees cry, wail, "Whyyyyy?" or something like that.

What does Bullet want? Why, Bullet wants to buy Billy. Of all the ghouls I’ve saved, interacted with, worked with, and fought alongside this is the first time someone has tried to buy one and he wants to buy the only ghoul-kid I remember seeing in the game? Um, that’s effed up.

So, I ask him "Why? Why do you want to buy Billy?"

He says because ghouls don’t need rest or sleep or food and make great slaves.

So, I say "No! You don't buy people!"

He doesn’t even get mad. He acts like he’s just asked me for a piece of gum and I’ve said, "Oh, sorry. This was my last piece." He just turns and walks away.

Now, I’m not a bad guy in this game, not really. I’ve been playing this game pretty straight-laced. I hardly steal at all and I only do drugs sometimes. But, with a silent apology to Billy for what’s about to happen... I pull out my high-powered rifle with a bitching scope on it and drop into a crouch. Well, the stars aligned because I managed to critical hit the guy in the back of the head.

I'd intended to simply kill him. What I hadn't intended to do right in front of FridgeBilly was to blow Bullet's head completely off his shoulders resulting in gouts of blood spray from his neck stump as he crumpled to the ground. Oops. Sorry if I grossed you out Billy.

I’ll put up with a lot, I really will... but nobody should be buying or selling kids that’ve been stuck in a fridge for 200 years... wait. I don’t really need to qualify that. Kids shouldn’t be sold, period.

Oh, in case you were wondering? Billy got home safely. His parents were still there and had also been turned into radioactive undying hairless hideously burned ghouls as well so all's well... or as good as it gets in the Commonwealth these days. The real tragedy is the mother's shoes. I've editted them out of this picture so you won't be completely distracted. I'm surprised Billy didn't run from those when he saw them. Sure, being burned up is bad and all, but that is REALLY no excuse for wearing ugly shoes.
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